OMG! The Goverment has a heatwave plan to deal with the soaring temperatures in Britain. Last week was the hottest day of the year (apparently!) with a record temperature of…only 32°C. Snigger. Seriously I’m sorry to laugh but 32°C is not that hot. Having been brought up in the South of France, I am no stranger to heat waves and heat, and 32°C is not a heat wave. 32°C is summer time. And summer time in the South of France means water shortages and no rain for months, EVERY summer! I understand that heat is a foreign concept in England (well you have radiators), but surely the Government shouldn’t be acting as if World War 3 has broken out! The problem is that heat and sun do occur in England, but usually only one day amongst many rubbish ones. Consequently, the British know this may be their only chance to get a tan so they all run out to the nearest park and turn into lobsters.

But now that the heat is here for a while, everyone panics. Staying out in the sun is no longer the done thing. What should we do!!!???, people cry. And the Government comes up with a heat wave plan. Even the news was giving me advice about what to eat when it’s hot. Surely it’s obvious??? I mostly live on salads and ice cream during the summer as anything cooked is a)too much effort in the heat and b)warms your body. Common sense people. You do have it. And you don’t need the Government to be your Mum. People still complain about the Nanny state, but as soon as something slightly different happens, everyone panics and turns to the Goverment for answers. Grow up and turn to the Mediterranean way of life- siesta, swimming and suncream! …But try to ditch the socks and sandals. Way too British.